Let’s All Take The Lord’s Name In Vain As We Masturbate

Religious blasphemy phone sex has its fans. Usually they were brought up in strict, overly religious households with weird ideas about sex. Catholics in particular, but I’ve done calls with men of many different religions, but more were Catholic than any other religion. One used to call regularly that was a church Vicar and he’d so get off on me repeating over and over, “Jesus Fucking Christ!” Then he’d say how disappointed and horrified his congregation would be if he ever was found out to be calling phone sex lines. I said as long as he wasn’t dipping into the donations to pay for it, it was fine.

It’s amazing how odd some of these callers can be, talking about everything from drinking Jesus’s cum like it was the wine served in church, to singing religious songs/hymns re written with very naughty lyrics. I’ve never had one that talked about fucking in a graveyard or anything like that, but fucking nuns and priests and them fucking each other, oh yes. They have many thoughts about the not so celibate lifestyles that these men and women of the church lead behind closed doors.

Who among us doesn’t cry out, “Oh God!” as we are in the throes of orgasmic delight and cumming? Most I would think, it just seems to come natural even for atheists like me. The selection online of religious sex toys is bizarre, from Christ on the cross dildos to baby Jesus butt plugs, yes I am serious. Religion and sex are strange bedfellows indeed, and ones brought up in homes where all sex outside of procreative sex within the confines of marriage are some pretty odd birds and get some odd fetishes as a result of such limited thinking. Restrictions breed fetishes like nothing else. So if talking about God and sex is what gets you off, call up for some religious blasphemy phone sex tonight! Amen!